Helen Rowland

Telling lies is a fault in a boy, an art in a lover, an accomplishment in a bachelor, and second-nature in a married man.

A fool and her money are soon courted.

Wedding: the point at which a man stops toasting a woman and begins roasting her.

There's so much saint in the worst of them, and so much devil in the best of them, that a woman who's married to one of them, has nothing to learn of the rest of them.

Failing to be there when a man wants her is the greatest sin a woman can commit - except being there when he doesn't want her.

In love, somehow, a man's heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place.

Nowadays love is a matter of chance, matrimony a matter of money and divorce a matter of course.

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it.

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor.

After marriage, a woman's sight becomes so keen that she can see right through her husband without looking at him, and a man's so dull that he can look right through his wife without seeing her.

A woman's flattery may inflate a man's head a little; but her criticism goes straight to his heart, and contracts it so that it can never again hold quite as much love for her.