Katie Hopkins

When the only thing you look forward to in life is lunch, you know you have had your just desserts, and it is time to call it a day.

Living in the 'Big Brother' house is a bit like living in hell. Only hotter.

If you over-deliver and prove yourself to be an asset to the company, you will be rewarded as a result.

As I often lecture businesses, it is not the email you send which matters, but how people feel when they read it.

If I was fat and had a strong regional accent and was a bloke, I'd be a stand-up. Because I think I'm funny.

I think you can tell a great deal from a name. For me, there are certain names that I hear, and I think, 'Urgh.' For me, a name is a shortcut of finding out what class that child comes from and makes me ask, 'Do I want my children to play with them?'

In our private lives, we hate saying sorry. I would rather saute my eyeballs in butter than admit I am wrong to my husband.

Some of us have tough lives and find chocolate is a comfort and a friend. And some of us prefer a night on the sofa with Ant & Dec to hitting the gym. But whatever your excuse - and there is always an excuse - we are a nation of fatties.

If you are confiding in someone, it needs to be the woman in your life. If that woman is your mother, you may as well scuttle back under her petticoats and let the real women in pencil skirts and tortuous heels get on with the job of husband-hunting.

The great thing about letting people be true to themselves is they often do very good things indeed.

I've been no-platformed from every university with a strong Islamic faith community.

A state school class can only learn as fast as its thickest child. Your kid misses stuff, mine has to wait while yours catches up.