Bob Newhart

It's kind of hard coming from 'Saturday Night Live,' which is a sketch-driven show, to a movie.

People have told me, 'My dad passed on, but I have great memories of watching your shows with him.' It doesn't get any better than that.

Don't live in the past. There's no point. You can't change anything. What a waste of time.

Well, my career choice made a difference because I never would have met my wife, Jenny. I met her through comedian Buddy Hackett. He set us up on a blind date and then we got married.

All comedians are, in a way, anarchists. Our job is to make fun of the existing world.

Sometimes you forget you're famous. You wonder, 'Why is that person staring at me?'

Mark Twain gave us an insight into the life on the Mississippi at the turn of the century.

Stammering is different than stuttering. Stutterers have trouble with the letters, while stammerers trip over entire parts of a sentence. We stammerers generally think of ourselves as very bright.

When I was off TV, people would ask me to please come back, which I think was their way of saying, 'There's nothing out there for us.'

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.

I was very political when JFK ran.

I was never a Certified Public Accountant... I just had a degree in accounting. The reason I was never a Certified Public Accountant was because it would require passing a test, which I would not have been able to do.