I'm not sure my books would translate into movies very easily. So rather than have someone do a terrible job, I haven't been willing to sell them.

When you're an author, you're always two people. Jasper the writer is different from Jasper the person at home.

There is a contract between the reader and the writer. The readers give me their hard-earned cash, and I have to entertain them.

The fun one can have writing books about books is limitless, to be honest.

My late wife Olympia was Goan and I've been to India many times. I love the food there. We used to do our shopping in Southall, where you can find cheap but wonderful fruit like mangoes, vegetables and spices. I didn't do much of the cooking, as Olympia did a lot - I was the under-chef and did some of the chopping.

It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that it is more difficult to be witty every day than to say pretty things from time to time.

Things go bad after a divorce and often stay that way. It is rare for the parties to return placidly to a time before they met. A bitterness lingers on. Those who call this our Independence Day, fantasising of returning to a never-never time before they married, when they were free, easy, single, and master of their fate, are delusional.

I've three children, three grandchildren, I work, I travel, and I'm very happily married. I'm very satisfied and happy with my life and there really isn't anything I want.