Newfoundlanders, what are we? We're slobbering idiots, slack-jawed simpletons, rustic fish billies living in Dogpatch-on-the-rocks, lower than lower Slobovians, the laughing stock and 'white trash' of Canada.

This satire business, that was one of the worst things that ever happened to me. I was certified funny. From then on, I had to be funny - people expected it. Twice the work for the same pay.

I always had this feeling when writing about all politics... that when it's so lopsided, that if a newspaper or news organization has any weight whatsoever, it should automatically go to the other side.

I still get a few dirty looks over the racks in the supermarket, but nobody kicks me in the shins on Water Street. I've made sort of a point, apart from being a social dud, not to fraternize with the people I write about.