George Jean Nathan

So long as there is one pretty girl left on the stage, the professional undertakers may hold up their burial of the theater.

An actor without a playwright is like a hole without a doughnut.

Love is the emotion that a woman feels always for a poodle dog and sometimes for a man.

Love is an emotion experienced by the many and enjoyed by the few.

A life spent in constant labor is a life wasted, save a man be such a fool as to regard a fulsome obituary notice as ample reward.

A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled, but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy.

Criticism is the art of appraising others at one's own value.

Women, as they grow older, rely more and more on cosmetics. Men, as they grow older, rely more and more on a sense of humor.

The path of sound credence is through the thick forest of skepticism.

Love demands infinitely less than friendship.

An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out.

Beauty makes idiots sad and wise men merry.