A writer's job is to tell the truth.

The Super Bowl isn't for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame piece about the game I can put it on my expense account.

I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it comes in the mail next month. If you don't return the form the area you live in might get less government money and you wouldn't want that to happen, would you.

Writers don't retire. I will always be a writer.

The death of my own son has made me more sensitive. It's made me more compassionate.

I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death.

I've witnessed the survival of the theatre several times when it was meant to be dying.

I like pop music. I also like the sound of a dying refrigerator. I can listen to that for an hour and a half if I'm in the mood.